live every week like it’s Shark Week.

I’m on a bit of a post-Shark Week come down today so I thought I’d share some of my pits and peaks of the past week. I love that it is held at this time every year – it’s like Christmas has come early, but instead of gifts and family time we get blood and SHARKS! I view Shark Week as if it was my child (let’s call her Bitey) and while I would never criticize Bitey because she’s perfect the way she is, there are a few things I would like to point out in hopes of pressuring her into being better next year. Only because I love her of course.

Firstly, I understand the word predation is an excellent word – it means ‘the capturing of prey as a means of maintaining life’. Pretty cool right? And very applicable to Shark Week. But the hosts of the different documentaries need to learn to use this word a little more sparingly. Shark Week already has a drinking game (I looked it up, check it out) but I think a drink every time someone says predation needs to be added to the rules. Or maybe too many people already did that and ended up with alcohol poisoning, I don’t know.

I also want to point out the unfortunate contradiction of Shark Week’s conservation message when compared with some of the more sensationalist documentaries. At the end of most of the docos, victims will point out that they don’t want sharks to become extinct, they’re wonderful creatures and they were just doing what comes naturally, etc etc. But one of the voice overs also told me sharks had the taste for human blood, would specifically hunt and stalk humans and that the force of being attacked by a shark was like being hit by a semi-trailer going 100km/hour…. umm OK, I’m much more frightened of sharks than I ever was before. Thanks Discovery.

There is so, so much I loved about this year’s Shark Week, I don’t even know where to begin. It was the 25th anniversary, which meant lots of great recaps and ‘best of’ lists and it was also the first time we’ve had 24-7 Shark Week – amazing. Air Jaws Apocalypse featured the most incredible footage of sharks I have ever seen. But my favorite feature this year was Great White Appetite, hosted by this guy.

Charles Ingram took his role as a Shark Week host quite seriously and he made for some very entertaining viewing. To test the appetite of the great white shark, Ingram fed tuna after tuna after tuna to a shark to see if he would ever be full. The dialogue went something like this..

Let’s see if he wants this tuna…. YEP HE ATE THE TUNA

Let’s try another tuna and see if he’s still hungry…. YEP HE ATE THE TUNA

Surely he’s full by now or maybe he’ll have one more…. YEP HE ATE THE TUNA

This happened eight times. Moral of the story? Sharks like tuna. I’m not sure if we needed 20 minutes of footage of a shark eating tuna to prove this, but it happened nonetheless. At different times, Ingram said the shark ate 25% or 20% of its total body weight. You’re fabulous Charles, but maybe spend a little more time on your facts and little less on your abs.

There’s so much more I want to share about Shark Week (including the quote of the week – ‘I didn’t realise I was in a shark’) but I think I’ve probably rambled on enough for now. If you want to discuss it any further you know where to find me. In the meantime, live every week like it’s Shark Week. And if you’re a seal living on Seal Island, stay away from Sector 4.