juice cleanse 2: juice harder.

Remember that time I did a three-day juice cleanse? That was fun right? I drank lots of delicious juices, preached about the benefits of pilates and convinced myself I could live a life without sugar, dairy or alcohol. That post-juicing mentality did stick around for a couple of weeks, but pretty soon I was back to ice cream, chocolate and one-too-many Sav Blancs. Oops. Major oops in fact – ‘my wedding dress doesn’t fit me six weeks out from my wedding’, ‘what the frick am I going to do’ kind of oops. What can I say? There was something so damn enjoyable about eating junk food, watching the Olympics, admiring the athletes’ bodies and laughing at the gymnastics/diving/pole vaulting mishaps.

Juice cleansing is a bit like mountain climbing – at the time it can be uncomfortable, arduous and just all-round hard work, but once you’re finished you seem to conveniently forget how tough it was and only remember the ‘glow’. And with that glow on my ‘things I need to recapture’ list, the lovely team at Urban Remedy put together a special bridal package to get me back on track. I will do two three-day cleanses (this week and next) and then a full on five-day cleanse the week after my hens night. So let’s get down to business.

Day one: I start my day with a bit of a run and then jump straight into my first juice at my desk by 9am. The berry smoothie is delicious! So delicious that I actually swapped the 6th juice of each day (coconut milk and cashew – bleh) for another berry smoothie. Hooray. Unfortunately, hunger pangs kick in about 30min later, but I’m determined to ride them out. I think the last cleanse I did was a bit easier because I wasn’t at work – being at my desk makes me want to snack mindlessly while googling puns I can use for story intros.

11am. I literally watch the clock tick over from 10:59am and dash to the fridge to grab my lemon/cayenne pepper mix. It’s a bit tart and spicy but it hits the spot. Unfortunately I’m a clumsy fool and spill about 3/4 of my juice all over the desk. I guess I’ll just have to wait two more hours for sustenance then. I know it’s only day one, but I can’t help but hate how upbeat and chipper I sounded in my last review. This is hard, damn it. I want to whinge.

1pm. The lunch soup is so darn delicious – lentils, tomato, carrot, celery, garlic and olive oil, I just wish there was more of it. I’m feeling very lethargic though, finding it pretty hard to concentrate. Hopefully an energy boost will kick in this afternoon because I am starting to daydream about a skinny latte. Mmmm caffeine.

3pm. The much-needed energy boost has come from the pineapple, apple and mint juice – hooray for sugar. I love how well planned-out these juices are, giving me just what I need when I need it. I’m guessing that’s probably not by accident. Anyway it’s enough to keep me powering through until home time. Driving home I am feeling a little light-headed and ready to sleep. Loud music and open windows keep me on task.

5.30pm. I have my soup as soon as I get in the door (broccoli, leek, asparagus, peas, cashews and olive oil) and I must say, I’m still not sold on broccoli. I know how good for me it is – nutrients, antioxidants, superfood etc but it tastes gross. I think my hatred stems from the fact my mum used to try and trick me into eating it – mashing it with potato and then acting completely innocent when I questioned what the green stuff in the potato was. By 6.30pm, I’m feeling a bit sorry for AK having to put up with my weird, groggy, emotional, unstable mood. He’s a champ though and does a good job of snapping me out of it, even if he is eating a huge bowl of spaghetti bolognese right in front of me. I’m completely wrecked and at 8.30pm I send myself off for an early night.

Day two: Oh hey headache, thanks for waking me up at 4.30am. I was only dreaming about cupcakes, no biggy. Just look at how revitalised I am already. I remember this painfully-unwanted visitor from my last cleanse and remind myself it’s probably to do with my body ridding itself of toxins. Or something. After about a litre of water I’m feeling much better and head off to a PT session with my trainer Pamela. She doesn’t have much sympathy for my juice cleanse situation unfortunately. Sometimes I think she relishes my pain. I have my berry smoothie on the drive to work and try to remind myself why I am doing this. Clear skin, more energy, less bloating, wedding dress. It’s a mantra I think I’m going to have to repeat throughout the day today.

1pm. I’ve turned a bit of a corner from tired and bratty to energised and positive. Or at least less whiny. The soup is yummy and fills me up and I have a very productive afternoon, boosted by my 3pm pineappley, juicy treat.

5pm. OK confession time. I reealllyyyy wasn’t feeling the broccoli today – I had a rough day and one smell of the green concoction convinced me I would rather go without. It’s actually not that bad and probably one of the best of the concoctions for me with all the greenery, but instead I drank peppermint tea and ate some fruit with my friend Katie. I know, I’m a bad person. In my defense, our last afternoon hangout involved cider and cheese so I think this was an improvement.

Day three: I wake up feeling a lot clearer than I have the past two mornings – finally I’m starting to find my juice cleanse groove. Jumped on the scale, down 1.3kg so far, what a nice little reminder of why I am doing this. I go for a nice 45min run and then head off to work drinking my morning smoothie, celebrating the fact it’s Friday AND my last cleansing day. Yay!

11.30am. I actually almost forgot about my lemon/cayenne pepper drink but I’m happy to have something to sip on when the hunger pangs kick in. I really do think the hardest part about doing a juice cleanse is stopping the habit of snacking – especially at work. Last time I was home for the three days, so I could watch movies and go to pilates classes and get massages at my leisure. Wouldn’t life be so much easier if work didn’t get in the way.

1pm. I could have this lentil soup for lunch every day and not get bored of it. Sure, it would be greatly improved with the addition of a crusty bread roll, but it really is so delicious. I steal two grapes from my co-worker to end on a sweet note and head back to my desk for an afternoon of power. I’ve finally hit that point in the cleanse where I’m feeling really good. I think I just hit it earlier last time because I wasn’t chained to my desk writing news stories for three days. BUT, I still got there in the end and although I won’t be sad to see the end of this cleanse, I’m still very happy I’ve done it. Luckily, because I’ll be doing it all over again next week, except it will be level 2, which is less fruit and more veges. No more pineapple glory, boo hoo. My morning smoothie will have spinach in it (interesting choice) and my afternoon juice will involve pear and cucumber (sounds pretty good to me).

5pm. OK broccoli, you and I need to get better acquainted. It doesn’t help that Katie is now at my house using my oven to make cupcakes. She is an absolute cupcake queen and they smell so darn delicious. But I warm up my green soup and it’s actually better than I remember. Enjoyable even. I finish my night with a mug of berry sensation tea and the arrival of my favorite lady. Have a great weekend everyone!


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